Feeling overwhelmed and confused? Me too! So many of us enter into midlife bewildered by the physical, emotional, and relationship changes that we experience. There is no one size fits all manual to this journey. Our friends, mothers, colleagues, and doctors all may experience these changes in their own way. This “spectrum” of symptoms makes it harder to find the individualized help we need. Thank goodness for the internet, right!? Well, as one friend told me, it can be like drinking from a 5 inch fire hose. It is often literally too much information. So how are we supposed to know what advice is best for us?

Has it ever dawned on you that perhaps you had the answers all along? Maybe a quiet conversation with yourself (your values, your experiences, your preferences) might help you find your best YOU.

Let me explain.

I’ve started focusing on envisioning the ME I want to be. I literally do this at night in bed before I go to sleep. I think of the me that I need to be the next day, and envision the best version of what that would look like. Do I want to be brave, smart, successful, loving, fit, a good mother, daughter, friends, partner?? Every day, I set an intention for the next day. I literally “envision” that person. Big meeting? I envision competence and knowledge. Difficult conversation with family? I envision love, grace, patience. Day off with the kids? I envision a me that is carefree and fun and not focused on work. Yes, it is hard to envision the unknown. Sometimes it feels a little silly. But it does work! I often imagine having qualities of people I admire. Last week I envisioned being a quick-witted and confident as Claire Fraser on Outlander. Inspiration comes from many places!! And then each day I check in and see how I did. I try to be kind to myself. Sometimes I am not the best me I can be. But I tried… and there is always tomorrow.

So try envisioning the you you want to be, then work backwards from there. Send me note and let me know how it went!!